So it's that point in the semester. Finals crunch. Normally this is accompanied by an extremely overwhelming urge to get home for the holidays, and nothing else. Well, lots of stress and a lack of sleep, but that's about it. Mostly I just want to be home.
This year, well, it's different. I want to be home, I can't wait. I keep thinking about my family and friends. I'm starting to have dreams I'm home (but then in the dream I realize I haven't taken my finals and it gets stressful). My cozy house and lovely town are calling me home. (And Christmas--I LOVE Christmas.) But...it's bittersweet. This time I actually am a little sad to leave. Suddenly the end is here and reality is sinking it, and it's hitting me that I'm not coming back. It's not like Connecticut College where leaving means you'll be gone for just a month. Everyone is still there when you get back. Your room is exactly how you left it. Leaving for break isn't really leaving. There is no coming back to this. Sure, I'll come back to Spain. We have a pretty good thing going. When I come back, though, it won't be the same. I won't be studying. I won't have my room up on the ninth piso with my host family. The study abroad group I've spent four months with won't be here. I feel like the semester flew by, and there are so many things I meant to do. I meant to make more Spanish friends. I meant to go to the Mercado Central more often. I meant to write in my journal every day. I meant to blog more. I meant to travel around Spain more. I meant to go to the beach more often. I meant to eat more paella, drink more horchata, and go out for tapas. I meant to do so much. And I didn't. Or did I? It seems like the semester went by without anything happening. To be fair I have had classes (this is still a semester of school, after all). And when I really think about it, even with classes I've managed to do a lot. I've had an internship in cardiovascular surgery. I've been teaching English to two kids. I have a language partner. I've made Erasmus friends from England. And I've traveled to multiple countries. I have done a lot, I just didn't do exactly what I had planned. So I guess I feel like I didn't do anything because I didn't really do anything I was expecting to do. But maybe that is exactly why we should study abroad. Throw your plans out the window. Realize that life happens, and you don't always do what you had planned on. Sometimes it works out for the best, even better than your plans could have been. Sometimes you miss out. I missed out on some things, sure, but I also did so much I never would have planned. In the end I can't say I've regretted this experience at all. I've met great people along the way and there are so many moments I'm never going to forget--everything from seeing a heart stopped for surgery and scrubbing in, to the cliché but obligatory trip to Paris, to the nights spent wandering around the park with friends or staying up to watch the sunrise, to the panic caused by Iberia announcing a huelga (strike) for the date of our flight home (which was cancelled, by the way). Despite all that, it is still finals crunch, and it is still the holidays. The normal urge to return home is there (it's like I'm living on a migration pattern or something). My time here has been amazing, but nothing beats home for me. I am a homebody. I love my family--blood family and the family you just kind of gain as you go through life. (They may not have any legal standing as my family, but I challenge you to tell me they aren't.) Charlottesville is my home, and as sad as I am to be leaving Valencia, I can't think of a place on Earth where I am happier. So in a little over a week I will recharge in Charlottesville. And then I'll be off again. Then home for a bit, and off again after that. But, no matter what, I'll always make my way back home. Because I've yet to find anywhere that is more of a home than good ol' C'ville.
1 Comment
Rick, aka, Dad.
12/11/2012 02:12:37 pm
So excited you are coming home in just a little over a week because this home, and good ol' Cville, isn't the same without you!
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Claire AngelineI am traveling the world from October 2017-October 2018, and the plan is to visit all seven continents. I'm a vegetarian foodie, a baker, a dance enthusiast, a nonprofit co-founder, and a huge travel addict. When I'm not traveling I'm putting my MPH to good use and doing public health research. Archives
September 2016
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